Variety Is Great… Until People Disagree With You

We say “variety is the spice of life”… until someone disagrees with us.

In this thoughtful and deeply practical episode of the Live Faith First Podcast, Elliot Sands sits down with author, speaker, and leadership coach Dr. James Borishade to talk about why human differences frustrate us so much—and how we can learn to navigate those differences in healthier ways.

From marriage and ministry to leadership and workplace dynamics, James explores how our backgrounds, personalities, wounds, and wiring shape the way we communicate and respond to conflict.

Drawing from his own painful divorce experience and years of studying relationships, James shares why our “misery” often becomes the birthplace of our ministry, how humility changes communication, and why curiosity is one of the most important tools for building bridges in a divided world.

This conversation covers

• Why differences are intentional—not accidental
• Marriage, communication, and “early warning systems”
• Leadership, humility, and empowering others
• How childhood experiences shape adult behavior
• Building bridges through curiosity and better questions
• The importance of understanding before judging

If you’ve ever struggled with difficult conversations, frustrating people, or relationships that feel strained by differences, this episode offers practical wisdom rooted in faith, leadership, and emotional intelligence.

Dr. James Borishade is an author, leadership strategist, speaker, and organizational consultant passionate about helping people connect across differences in healthier and more productive ways.Raised on the South Side of Chicago, James studied sociology, Christian counseling, and organizational leadership, eventually earning a doctorate focused on Christian leadership and human behavior.

After walking through a painful divorce, James began deeply studying relationships, communication styles, leadership dynamics, personality differences, and the ways personal history shapes human interaction. That journey ultimately led to his book, “Connecting Across Differences”, which equips individuals, couples, churches, and organizations to better understand themselves and others. James currently serves as CEO of Circle Urban Ministries, where he focuses on leadership development, community transformation, and helping people operate in their God-given purpose.

Elliot Sands is the host of the Live Faith First podcast—a dynamic space where faith meets real-world challenges. With a rich background as a pastor, school principal, health-tech co-founder, and now Executive Director of Faith First, Elliot brings deep wisdom and practical insight to every conversation.  As a husband, father, and grandfather, he weaves personal experience with thoughtful discussion, tackling tough topics with clarity and compassion. Live Faith First is all about bridging divides—whether in society or the church—encouraging listeners to step beyond echo chambers and build real, meaningful relationships across the aisle, the street, or the table.